For a long time, I always thought that having a good day depended on how it went. If everything at work went great, if everything aligned itself well, if I ate well, if I worked out, if I did everything right – I would have a great day. If others treated me right, if everyone was fair, if business deals went well. And then, I grew up a little, and realized that I can’t be dependent on external factors, for internal happiness and peace.
Certainly, it’s MUCH easier when all falls into place, but what if it doesn’t? Does that mean that we have to walk around upset all day? Does this mean we have to be gloomy, or grouchy, or think that we’re depressed? What if it all falls apart, and nothing goes well for a long time? Should we just give up and slide down into a deep hole, with no bright light in sight?
At times, awful things happen to us, to those we love. We have challenging days, challenging times, and even really unfortunately years. We can’t control it all. We are unable to control the people in our lives, the ones we know well and those we don’t. We can’t control much, except how we react, what we take in, and how we use everything that happens, to build our future and current emotions.
Everything that happens – is good.
But only when we use what happens, that doesn’t initially seem good, as motivation to grow. We can take what we’ve been given, and go into a demise, or we can rise up! How amazing is that? But, this takes a lot of talking through, thinking through, and positive action – especially if it is not yet natural for you.
I had a former VP always tell me that he thought I was the most positive person he’s ever known. And it seemed silly that he thought this about me, because for me, it’s just the EASIEST way to live. I could complicate life, or blow small and big issues up, but then I had to deal with not only what truly did go wrong, but with the consequences of my emotions and frustration and disappointments. And no one has time for that!
If we surround ourselves with people who don’t have a bright, positive or grateful outlook on life – regardless of what’s going on in their lives – our lives start to get a bit morose. If things are never good enough for those closest to us, or our family members or our coworkers, and it’s very tough to be around these types of people and stay happy and positive. I wish nothing more than for others to always see everything with a glass full, and then use what isn’t perfect, and build upon it and improve daily. Otherwise, what’s the alternative? Constantly being upset, and using those emotions to cause more drama and problems?
If we break it down, the day always has its ups and downs. It’s impossible for every single day of our lives to be a shining beautiful rainbow. But, how do you choose to see the ups? How do you react to the downs? What are you going to do about both?
Always keep moving on.
This is probably my number one rule in life. That, and knowing that everything I need, I already have. Because if you can’t keep going, keep moving, keep changing, and keep getting stronger and better, what’s the point? We can certainly never be done growing, and learning, and investing in ourselves. Regardless of the trauma of what’s happening, it’s much easier to keep going, than to stand still or sink.
When I was a teen, I watched a lot of Oprah on TV, and Oprah and her guests really drilled positive thinking into my head. Then, as a teen, I remember reading Chicken Soup for the Soul, and reading some of those stories which were heart wrenching. Some people really suffered tragic events! The stories were about how so many rose, and grew and became stronger because of those events. Reading that book taught me that we as humans are able to handle so much.
Ideally, it’s not about suffering, but to move out of it as quickly as possible.
It’s usually the little things that upset us the most, things we actually have the most control over. If you find yourself upset over this or that, and these tiny things and events aren’t life threatening events, then you must stop. It’s time to put an end to constantly raising your blood pressure, or stress, or worry or anxiety over anything that isn’t a lion chasing you as their prey or something similar. We’re all usually upset because of TINY LITTLE THINGS, that we make big.
The worst part about being upset about tiny little things, is that they tend to build up. It may be a TON of tiny little things that always go wrong, and things that you are so used to being unhappy about. Maybe it’s your commute, or the people in line for your coffee, or the news-feed with the wrong political story, or it’s a passive post from a relative, or it’s this and that, and this could get endless. So by the time you get to work, anything and everything will set you off. What if you did actually have to handle a real emergency in life? How could you handle it well, when your foundation for handling the little stuff, is so out of wack?
We must get stronger, and we must get more positive, and look at every single obstacle as an opportunity to do our best, and to use it to build our experience and strength. There’s nothing that can ever set us back, if we choose this way of thinking and way of life.
It’s most important to always practice looking at the good of it all, and being grateful for every incident and event. Eventually, with weeks and months and years of practice, you may not even recognize anything that could upset you or frustrate you. Because you have been so busy finding the bright star of every event and life change.
Can you just imagine living a life where it’s all good? Where you are determined to help yourself gain more knowledge, and strength, and therefore positively impact those around you – to do the same?
Imagine your friends and family and most importantly – your children – also being positive, happy, grateful and peaceful. They are able to handle small problems and big problems, and get motivated if and when they fail? Imagine being able to look at situations and know that it may feel like a step backwards, but automatically see them as leaps forward.
Often, hindsight is 20/20, and that’s the greatest gift in life. Yet, when we know that we’ll be ABLE to see the past CLEARLY in the present, that is when we can peacefully resolve what feels unsolvable, almost immediately.
Cheers to YOU, Strong Humans! Stay happy, positive, and may the BIG and LITTLE things, always make your day better.